Working With Your Inner Critic To Gain The Life You Want To Be Living

What does your inner critic tell you? That you’re stupid, fat, no one ever notices you, you’ll never get things done, you can’t do anything right, you’re ugly, there’s something wrong with you, they don’t really love you, and on and on. 

Our personal inner critic typically come from overt or covert messages we were given in childhood but they also come from messages received later in life…and almost always from another person. 

As we grow up, we unconsciously adopt and integrate this pattern of destructive thoughts toward ourselves and others. When we fail to have awareness of this voice and we fail to create separation from it, we allow it to influence our behavior and shape the direction of our lives. It may sabotage our successes or our relationships, preventing us from living the lives we want to lead and becoming the people we seek to be.

There are ways to overcome your inner critic and live the life you want to be living. The first step is recognizing your inner critic. Cultivate awareness and curiosity. Pay attention to the critical messages your inner critic throws up to you. Once you have a handle on what it likes to say to you, take a step back and recognize that this voice is not a reflection of reality. It is just a pattern of thought. Become the observer of your thoughts and create separation and space between you and the thoughts. Start here. 

Eventually the further work of cultivating self-compassion creates living from a space of freedom from your inner critic completely. It may pop up at times but there is no believing it anymore, no feeling the negative feelings that stem from the negative thoughts, and no behaving or acting on thoughts and feelings….meaning you’re free to live your life you dream about.